Wednesday, September 03, 2014 04:33

Oh, THAT kind of HANDgun…

- Wiccapundit

There seems to be an epidemic of grade-school kids bringing guns to school.  Er, uh, that is, making guns at school.  As in, making the shape of one with their hands.

Ionia kindergartner suspended for making gun with hand

Yakima kindergartner expelled for making a gun with hand

These people’s heads would explode if they saw the kinds of things my classmates and I played with at recess in grade school.  My friends had full-size plastic replicas of M-16s, and I actually had a half-size operating plastic version of an M-2 (“Ma Deuce”) .50 caliber machine gun.  It was belt-fed, just like the real McCoy, and would literally shoot plastic bullets out of the muzzle, albeit at non-lethal speeds.  (But dang, would they sting if they hit you.)  They looked something like these, although my M-2 was bigger and all olive drab, without the red “safety” muzzle tip.

Also back in the day, I went to a gun & military memorabilia show with my Boy Scout troop, where  I bought a dummy Vietnam-era fragmentation grenade.  It was hollow, but I could screw out the detonator, and I could pull back the spring striker, put a cap underneath it, hold it down with the spoon handle, and put the pin it.  At recess, we would play war games.  My friends would “attack” my machine gun nest, and I would pull the pin on the grenade, hear the cap go off, and heave it at my chums to drive off their attack.  After recess, I would walk around the school with the grenade hanging on my belt.

Oh, the horror!  And of course, I grew up to be a stone-cold killer softie.  Nowadays a kid can’t bring a “spork” to school in his lunch bag without violating the “zero tolerance” (read “zero  judgment”) policy.  If a kid gets attacked and tries to defend himself, HE gets in trouble.   In my youth, the teachers  would let a fight go on long enough to see if the bully got his comeuppance, or to prevent a smaller kid from getting the snot beat out of him.  I remember a middle-school coach who kept a set of boxing gloves, and he would let torqued-up adolescents wail away on each other until they exhausted themselves (and their anger) without permanent damage.

What a world we live in now.


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6 Responses to “Oh, THAT kind of HANDgun…”

  1. Gah! I hate this crap. Just goes to show the utter stupidity of people, particularly school administrators.

    Hell, growing up our school would be off on opening day of whitewing dove season, and kids would have gunracks with their hunting paraphernalia in full view of anyone in the school.

    And no one ever got shot, or maimed, or killed. Bunch of lily-livered wankers….

  2. Curtal Friar says:

    Oh dear God.

    This kind of crap really gets my blood pressure going.

    As you said, things were a lot different back in the day. We played cowboys and indians, cops and robbers, The Untouchables versus Al Capone and his gangsters, and any number of variations on that theme. During such play, the bad guys would invariably get “shot and killed” and fall to the ground in a “fake death.” Lol, as a rule, the bad guys always had to die.

    Things are definitely crazy today. I watched an episode of a reality show a couple of years ago, that followed a group of kids in a juvenile detention center. One kid, who had been there a month and would probably be there for another month or two, had done an absolutely horrible crime. Someone had pinned a note that read “kick me” on his back, and when he discovered it, he took the note off, stuck it on the back of the one who had put it on him, and gave that kid a kick. For such a vile, evil act, he was thrown out of school and sent to the detention center. Unbelievable.

    • Wiccapundit says:

      Welcome Friar. Yeah, sometimes I think I woke up in the “Spock’s Beard” universe where everything is reversed.

      Elphaba, my wife, thinks that schools are grooming people not to fight back; indoctrinating them to be submissive. She calls it “pussification.” Fortunately, where I live there is still a legal doctrine known as “fighting words.” If someone speaks ill of your momma and you kick his ass, this doctrine may be invoked as a defense against a charge of battery.

  3. Wiccapundit says:

    Dove hunting is excellent fun, and they are delicious if prepared properly. We used to wrap them in bacon (of course) and cook them in red wine, then serve with grits and homemade biscuits with mint jelly.

    When I was a kid, everyone and I mean EVERYONE carried a pocketknife. Since I was nine, I’ve carried a knife like people today carry a cellphone. I would no more leave the house without it than without my pants. A Kershaw one-hand-opening folder really is indispensable.

    The teacher used to ask one of the boys if she could borrow his knife to open a package or such, and nobody thought twice about it.

  4. Curtal Friar says:


    your recipe for dove sounds great. I just read it, it’s 7:15 a.m., and now I’m hungry for some, lol. A bowl of cinnamon flavored oatmeal is a poor substitute indeed for bacon-wrapped dove cooked in red wine.

    It made my son’s day, when he turned 8, to get his own pocketknife. He first had to demonstrate to me over the course of a few months that he knew how to use a knife safely first, which he did well. Now he’s looking forward to his first gun with which to go hunting.

    • Wiccapundit says:

      We can’t figure out what’s going on with some of the comments appearing on a white background. We’re trying to diagnose this and fix it.

      I went on my first dove hunt at age ten, with a single-shot .410 “snake-charmer.” Then I got my first gun of my own, a Remington Model 17 20 gauge pump (pre-1930′s) that had belonged to my father, and his father before him. It now belongs to my oldest son. Four generations have hunted dove with this gun.

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